classy as a doormat.

An elderly neighbor came by one evening recently to return a flashlight I had lent him during a blackout. I had been eating dinner, and my stomach, which usually expands and contracts from mild bloat to total “beer gut” a few times over the course of a day (thank you IBS!) had grown so large…

I used to be ugly.

There was a time, only a couple years ago, where I could walk into any bar I wanted and be totally ignored. I took this for granted. If I sidled up to the right guy, at the right moment when we were each just drunk enough, but not too drunk, and if I made the…